Read John 21:15-17

     As I was preparing for this Sunday’s message on forgiveness, an idea came to me upon which I have been musing. Jesus asked Peter three separate times, “Do you love me?” On the first occasion Jesus uses the word agape`. The second time around Jesus employs the term phileo. In plain terms, Jesus asks Peter, “Do you love me unconditionally?” Then, Jesus follows up by asking, “Will you be my friend?”

     Unconditional love is an action we are commanded to take. For the Christian community, agape` is a must. However, phileo or friendship is another matter. Phileo involves a choice. Phileo takes us beyond obligation to affection. Phileo says, “I want to be with you.”

     I firmly believe that people want to be more than tolerated. They want to be genuinely loved and welcomed. Of course, there are some folks who are easier to like than others. Yet, at some level, these are the very people who may need our friendship the most. The person who is most prickly on the outside could well be hurting greatly on the inside.

     The prayer I offer when encountering such people is simply this: “Lord, give me the grace to like this person. Help me to demonstrate to her that I come in friendship.” This is not an easy prayer to pray, I’ll admit. Yet, I’ve discovered that some of my closest friendships began with people I initially found hard to like.

     There’s an old saying in the Christian community that I pray you will keep in mind as you go about your day:
 

Make a friend.
Be a friend.
Bring a friend to Christ.